Cliffs of Dover Technical FAQ

Yeah no worries mate. A constructive comment. Here goes.
I purchased a game that has a disk. Like every other game I've ever purchased I put it into my computer and it loads STEAM. After two hours it looks all fancy. I press 'play game' and after a few seconds it reads 'LAUNCHER HAS STOPPED WORKING'.
So what do you want me to do, say STEAM is great. What a great system. It's awesome. Well I'm not. I'm saying this STEAM system sucks and if I was another person who doesn't read these forums for years and years I would have no idea what the hell to do. I've stayed up late to fly this thing but now I'm off to bed still not having a clue what to do. I'm sure some computer expert will fix it but why the hell should STEAM expect people to have to do this. Don't tell me about constructive comments and go somewhere to fix it. The thing should work straight away like every product that is sold for people's hard earned money. If I bought any product I would expect it to at least work or fully explain how to get it to work. Why should I have to know where to go to get it fixed. I didn't want a broken game.