Joke

[RickRuski]

A man and a woman were sitting beside each other in the first class section of an aeroplane.

The woman sneezed, took out a Kleenex, gently wiped her nose, then visibly shuddered for ten to fifteen seconds.

The man went back to his reading. A few minutes later, the woman sneezed again, took a tissue, wiped her nose, then shuddered violently once more.

Assuming that the woman might have a cold, the man was still curious about the shuddering. A few more minutes passed when the woman sneezed yet again.
As before, she took a tissue, wiped her nose, her body shaking even more than before.

Unable to restrain his curiosity, the man turned to the woman and said, "I couldn 't help but notice that you 've sneezed three times, wiped your nose and then shuddered violently. Are you Okay?"

"I am sorry if I disturbed you, but I have a very rare medical condition; whenever I sneeze, I have an orgasm."

The man, more than a bit embarrassed, was still curious.
"I have never heard of that condition before" he said.
"Are you taking anything for it?"

The woman nodded, "Pepper."

[RickRuski]

A guy asked a girl in a university library: "Do you mind if I sit beside you?" The girl replied with a loud voice: "I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!"

All the students in the library started staring at the guy; he was truly embarrassed.

After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy's table and
said: "I study psychology, and I know what a man is thinking. I guess you felt embarrassed, right?"

The guy then responded with a loud voice: "$500 FOR ONE NIGHT? THAT'S TOO MUCH!"

All the people in the library looked at the girl in shock. The guy whispered in her ear: "I study law, and I know how to screw people".

[raaaid]

a husband tells his wife:

i bet you cant tell me something that makes me sad and happy

wife: oh yeah of all your friends yours its the biggest

[swiss]

Originally Posted by RickRuski

A man and a woman were sitting beside each other in the first class section of an aeroplane.

The woman sneezed, took out a Kleenex, gently wiped her nose, then visibly shuddered for ten to fifteen seconds.

The man went back to his reading. A few minutes later, the woman sneezed again, took a tissue, wiped her nose, then shuddered violently once more.

Assuming that the woman might have a cold, the man was still curious about the shuddering. A few more minutes passed when the woman sneezed yet again.
As before, she took a tissue, wiped her nose, her body shaking even more than before.

Unable to restrain his curiosity, the man turned to the woman and said, "I couldn 't help but notice that you 've sneezed three times, wiped your nose and then shuddered violently. Are you Okay?"

"I am sorry if I disturbed you, but I have a very rare medical condition; whenever I sneeze, I have an orgasm."

The man, more than a bit embarrassed, was still curious.
"I have never heard of that condition before" he said.
"Are you taking anything for it?"

The woman nodded, "Pepper."

LOL!

Just discovered this one.
Truly awesome!

[RickRuski]

Elbow…

A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife.

"You come to the front door of the apartments. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside and the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3rd Floor. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell. OK?"

"Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow? .........


"What . ... . .. .. You're coming empty handed?"

_______________________________________________


Wise Italian Grandfather


An old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, "Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated ..38 revolver so you will always remember me."

"But grandpa, I really don't like guns.. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?"

"You lissina me, boy! Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos. "

"Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man.
"Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, 'Times up!' "?