Hey fellow newbie! I, too, am just learning to get around the skies in a decent manner in CoD, but I can tell you that if you're trimming is making your flying LESS controllable you're doing it wrong. The idea is to get the plane to fly straight and level (unless you want to climb, or dive, or some other desired effect).
First make sure you've assigned all 3 necessary trim controls to keys or better yet an axis. Once your new joystick arrives you may have extra rotation axis. These are perfect for trim settings.
You need to have increase/decrease buttons (if not using an axis as stated above) for: elevator, rudder, and aelirons. You will be using the aeliron trim the least, so assign it as the lowest priority.
If your plane is nosing up, you want to decrease the elevator slowly until it flies level. Once you change a setting you have to wait to see how the plane reacts; this doesn't happen instantly. If after you're plane has adjusted to the new trim you realize you need to go a little farther with it, or you've already gone too far, then re-adjust.
Give it 20-30 minutes where all you do is try to trim your plane, then mess up the trim on purpose and do it again, you'll get the hang of it quickly.
Also, if you need to use button because you don't have extra axis then also assign a 'reset trim' for all 3: rudder, elevator, and aeliron.
Also, google/youtube this as watching it visually may give you a better understanding. Good luck and happy flying!
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