you have to go to arlania first and talk to the guy in the castle (forgot his name). he gives you a quest and after that you can talk to the frog. :)

Just to be clear, I already got the quest, went and got the frog, brought her back to the castle, completed the quest. Now she is in the castle but she won't talk to me. Does that mean I missed the opportunity to get her as a wife?

Yep. Try to load a game from before talking to the frog. This time read the dialogue(I know it's hard with the often bad english, I never read it myself), and help the frog instead of the original quest giver.

Edit: To be more clear, first get the quest in the castle, then help the frog.

Too late for that now, I'm not going to go back that far. Maybe I'll get it right if I replay the game on "impossible" difficulty.

I used bable fish to translate wife item slots from russian manual. Here is the list:

Zombie
-Armor Boots Belt Artifact
Frog
-Helm Belt/Artifact Artifact Artifact
Pirate
-Weapon Boots Belt Regalia
Dwarf
-Shield?/Regalia Armor Boot Regalia
Elf
-Regalia Regalia Belt/Regalia Artifact
Demon
-Weapon Boots Weapon Belt/Artifact

I hope I didn't make any mistakes. Can someone confirm that dwarf wife has shield slot? Babel fish translated word as "panel" and I guessed it meant shield.

Shiled/regalia Armor boot and Regalia for the Dwarf Woman

do the items add up? i know this has probs been asked before..so if i had a "well of mana belt" on me and on my wife would it be +6 mana a turn opposed to plus 3? I'm still with the zombie wife..

Yes. Same items on you and your wife give bonuses.

Bonuses are applied at the same time though, so if an item gives +20% attack, having 2 of those will give +40%, not +20% and then another +20% over the previous 20%. (Else it would give +44% in total.)

All right. I have a trouble with my wife. I married Neoka. Then i asked her about a baby. I had to ask the Tree of Life. It agreed. I "Kissed my wife" the stupid game said that i'll just have to wait for the wonder. I've made like 40 battles after that and still no baby. Is there something wrong with Neoka? Or the info i had about 10 battles after i ask the wife for a baby is wrong?